Today I took a trip into the past. Mum’s house is still vacant, despite her passing over a year ago, but finally preparations are happening in earnest to sell it.I thought there might be more tears but time has a way of healing and reducing that ache and in its place leaving bitter sweet memories.
Anyone who’s lost both parents knows what it’s like. Pouring through “stuff”, reliving memories, holding on to sentimental items is part of the grieving and ultimately ‘letting go’ process.
But it doesn’t always happen overnight.
In my old bedroom yesterday I poured over boxes of trinkets I’d left there. Long forgotten momentos of my youth, dozens of retro earrings, beads, gloves, head pieces.
I had a few wild hippy years and the trinkets made me smile at the memories.
How ironic that in two weeks time we’re going to a good friend’s daughter’s 21st birthday party. The theme is 1920s and some of my past life recycled costume jewellery will be perfect.
What goes around comes around. Mostly.
So much can be recycled, years after their use. Though a lot will also be discarded.
I even found old coins no longer in circulation, the one and two cent piece. They’re worth nothing today yet somehow they still feel like a symbol of abundance. For at one time in my childhood this combined total bought me a decent bag of mixed lollies.
Ah, sweet memories.
Outside in the garden the green waste recycling started. Weeding, pruning, cutting down branches, mowing grass. Cutting down the old to make way for the new. Another family will hopefully, in time, enjoy mum’s once cherished garden.
Hubby found a huge lifelike plastic spider (probably thrown over the fence by the kids next door) and, being the prankster that he is, strategically placed it on my sister’s car windscreen.
Hours later, from inside, I heard her screaming. Clearly she’d found it. I found out later hubby had picked it up off the windscreen and flicked it onto her. It was only when it landed, rubbery side up, that she realised it was fake.
Yes, there were definitely more laughs than tears this weekend. Mum would have been happy.
Recycling the old, reliving the past then letting it go to make way for the new. That’s what this weekend was all about. It was a big start.
A few things I learnt from our day:
- The three box method of decluttering really is the best way. One for rubbish, one for donating and another for keeping and sorting later. I was more ruthless with discarding stuff then I imagined myself to be. Maybe it’s a sign that I’m embracing a new path.
- Everyone grieves in their own way. We haven’t rushed the selling of mum’s home, for various reasons, but now it’s time.
- It’s good to have a momento or two but everything has its day, even all those old photo albums that I created. These will be the hardest things to part with but there’ll come a time when they too will have to go. We came with nothing. We leave with nothing.
- It’s good to look back over old memories but it’s today that counts. And making new memories.
- Laughter really is the best medicine.
Make today count.
Cherish every moment and don’t be afraid to release those things that hold you back. Outdated things, toxic relationships, negative emotions and situations … if it doesn’t serve you, let it go.
Recycle that plastic, relive the fun road trips and remember those heartfelt memories that made you who you are but more importantly relish the moment.
That’s most really matters. Living right now and making every moment special.
In light and love as we continue the journey.
Sharing for: Frank’s Photo Challenge: Recycle
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