Flying Solo

Posted on by Miriam

I have to confess something.  I’ve been spending a lot of time with The Stranger in my bed lately.  My hubby’s been gone for nearly a week, interstate on a work trip, and it’s given me the freedom to indulge in a few guilty pleasures.  But it’s not what you think.  I miss my man and the house has been quiet without his laughter.

The time we’ve spent apart has given me time to start a new project which I’m really excited about.  It’s also allowed me to spend quality one-on-one time with the kids (when they’ve been home!)  and reflect on where I’m at in my life.  I’ve been able to do a few things I’ve been neglecting, like spending time in my garden, playing my guitar and catching up on some writing.

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I was out in my garden on the weekend and I thought it was funny how everywhere I looked there were single things, as though the Universe was in cahoots.

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There it was, the first daffodil of the season poking its head up. One solitary yellow flower.  It was alone but there are buds behind it and I know it won’t be long before there’s a whole sunny family of them out in full bloom.

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Further down my path my pineapple sage is growing rampant.  Again here was a solitary flower poking out amid the shaded greenery.  But it will eventually spread everywhere.

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The other morning this fella landed on my rooftop.  Normally they appear in pairs but he seemed content to be on his own.  I guessed his partner wouldn’t be too far away.

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Although I’m missing hubby and waking up next to him I know that it’s also healthy to sometimes fly alone.  It gives us a sense of strength in ourselves.

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So for now I’m relishing staying up late and spending lots of time with The Stranger in my bed, (that’s the latest Harlan Coben book in case you wondered) and eating more dark Lindt chocolate than I normally would.  Sinful guilty pleasures.

A bit like meditation, being alone has its positives:

  1. It helps you slow down.
  2. It connects you to yourself
  3. It provides space to unwind and find peace
  4. Makes you appreciate your relationships
  5. Time to reflect on this past year and where I’m heading
  6. Replenishes your self-confidence
  7. Helps you appreciate the smaller things
  8. You can stay up late and think more creatively
  9. There are less distractions and more focus.
  10. And you can finish a good book!

Despite all that, he’s home tomorrow and I’m excited.

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Wishing you all love, laughter, happiness and contentment with the ones you’re with, whether you’re surrounded by a family, a partner or simply yourself.

Whether you’re flying solo or in pairs, love life, love yourself and have a great week.

Stay safe and enjoy the journey.

95 thoughts on “Flying Solo”

  5. I didn’t know you play the guitar! Nice to know we have something in common (aside from eating chocolates! LOL!) 🙂 I also love the daffodil in your garden… I hope you have a great week ahead with your hubby! 🙂

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  8. Miriam, a beautiful tribute to why sometimes we do need our own time for self-reflection and care. Even in a supportive and loving environment, we all have needs only we, ourselves, can care for. Lovely! ❤️

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  9. A terrific and inspiring post, Miriam. I agree that we all need to enjoy our own company and spending time with ourselves. It can be very therapeutic. Wishing you a beautiful day!

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  11. Beautiful post Miriam! I don’t like to be alone at home without my husband or kids. Never have. But oddly enough I love being alone when I travel. Of course I’d rather have my family along but solo travel gives me a different freedom and forces me to be on my own. I always meet lots of people but seems to learn a lot about myself too.

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    1. Yes I’ve read a lot of your posts, Nicole, where you’ve traveled by yourself. I can well appreciate that it would definitely stretch you and take you out of your comfort zone.

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  12. Lovely post and I can understand your peace and reflection you find in some time by yourself (+children). I just the same, feel too crowded otherwise and Lindt chocolate indulgence is treat! Especially when reading a good book – for ages uninterrupted!

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  14. Very well said. I like your list. In my journey, I am trying to appreciate each and every positive thing and to be thankful (maybe sometimes for those not so positive things as well). Have a great week. 🙂

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  15. My husband is off today (Independence Day in the US)… and starting next Monday, he’s off for the whole week. Is it mean that I think after about half a day, he’s going to begin irritating me? 😛

    I’m glad you’ve had time to yourself to do things you love! 🙂

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  16. Like Jo, you had me wondering about your new project, too, Miriam. I’m glad to have read this post on the values of solitude in the meantime, but rest assured you’ve got another reader looking forward to seeing what you’re at work on. Given the renewed sense of energy infusing your writing of late, I’m sure it’s full of light and insight.

    Thanks for sharing, Miriam. Looking forward to what’s next! Enjoy the remainder of your alone time, and the return of your husband tomorrow.

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    1. Thanks Patrick for your support and for your kind words. I really do feel a sense of renewed purpose and can’t wait to fully immerse myself into this project. And ultimately to share it with my readers here. Hope you have a great week.

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  19. I know exactly what you mean! I miss my husband when he is out of town, but I also like being alone for a day or two, and having the freedom to think about only me. It is liberating, I think, and also makes me appreciate him more when he comes back. Lastly, it means I can lay in bed late at night, doing a crossword puzzle and watching HGTV without feeling the slightest bit guilty!

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  24. I’ve always kind of needed time to myself or I go mad. I used to stay up late because I would get time then but in recent years The Husband has been staying up even later and I can’t get that time unless I go to bed at 3am! Now the Eldest Son is at university, he seems to spend an inordinate amount of time on holidays so even days at home on my own are becoming rarer. I love them all to bits but sometimes I could do with the breathing space. 🙂

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  27. I recently had to fly solo too when my husband attended a conference. I love him and miss him, but it was a refreshing little break from routine, to cook or not cook, clean or not clean, to work or exercise late into the night if I felt like it. Very thoughtful and enjoyable post!

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  28. Absolutely love this Miriam… Beautifully written and very inspiring… I agree you need time alone sometimes to remember what’s important and what your ambitions are… I always miss my wife when we are apart but I do get a lot done ha! Love this post though keep it up!

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      1. Best read of my day! How long are his road trips usually? Megan occasionally goes away for 1-2 days and it Cannell challenging!!! Mainly because I eat everything and watch to too much ha! Honestly I miss her when she’s not here the bed is not the same

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        1. I know what you mean about the bed. I eat too much as well, but my main thing is staying up heaps later than I normally would! His trips can be anywhere from three days to over a week. But he’s home now! 🙂

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  30. Lovely post Miriam. I do think it’s far easier and more fun to be alone when you know it’s not permanent! I know I love alone time but only because I know my husband will be back!

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  32. My hubby travels every so often for work and, even though I miss him when he goes, I find the time apart restorative, in a way, and I’m always happy to see him when he returns. At our wedding we had the Kahlil Gibran reading, On Marriage, and I always think of the line ‘…let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.’ 🙂

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  34. I honestly used to hate being alone. I would be so restless and wound up. Now i enjoy the silence. I always have my Vivi with me and she and I have a nice routine when it’s just us at home. I really enjoyed this post Miriam. ❤

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  36. In the beginning, I thought you were reading Albert Camus’ “The Stranger” – – “I opened myself to the gentle indifference of the world.” — which didn’t seem to jive with the rest of the post… 😛

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