WPC: My Future Back on Track

Posted on by Miriam

Life teaches us lessons in the most unexpected places.  Last weekend while camping fairly close to home I walked one of the hardest tracks ever.  It was steep and it challenged me.  And it made me reflect on my life this past year and where I’m going in the future.

Where I am

The past week has been a soul searching time for me.

This time last year my life changed completely.

Sign of track

It has nothing to do with my unwell mum but perhaps it has everything to do with her. For it was this time last year I was at my most vulnerable.  My defences were down and my heart was wide open and raw with pain, angst and worry. There should have been caution tape around it.

What happened then reawakened something in me and turned my world upside down.  On the outside I was the same person, but on the inside I’d been split in two.

Obstacles

I thought I’d found a way through, a distraction.  I thought I’d been thrown a life line but it turned into a slippery pathway that consumed me and nearly destroyed me.

Slippery

I’ve felt torn and raw,  much like our walk on the weekend, one that left me breathless and my feet aching from raw skin that rubbed off and a bruised and broken toe nail.

When I read this week’s Daily Post Photo Challenge was ‘Future’ I realised I’d lost my focus completely.  I’d become consumed with something that wasn’t real.

Rocky road

And this walk seemed somehow symbolic.  It was a rocky path I had to tread.

I just didn’t realise how rocky it was going to be.

Walk (800x600)

During the past year I’ve shed buckets of tears and slowly lost my peace of mind.  I’ve lain awake endless nights but finally I realised things had to change.

I had to take back control of my life.  I prayed for guidance and strength.  And somewhere, deep inside me, I found it.  It ended today.

View from top

The beauty has always been around me but I’d become consumed with an illusion. This time last year life threw me a test. I took the dangerous way but I’m finding my way out.

Life and the pursuit of peace and happiness is often like that.  A steep uphill climb that we feel we’ll never reach.  But we do. To have courage we need to conquer our fears, and shift our focus.  And then the walk downhill is easier.  With faith we can breath again.

mountain top

I no longer fear the future.  Although I don’t know what lies ahead (who does?) and I still have a lot of healing to do, I know I’m on the right path. With the right people beside me.

The future will take care of itself now that I’ve made peace with the present.

I wish you all strength and courage in facing your mountains and your decisions in life.  Wishing you hope and faith in the future, whatever it holds.

116 thoughts on “WPC: My Future Back on Track”

  2. And that realization is what will set you free, my friend! Very well written using amazing images.
    Sorry you had to go through all that the last year but as you say here it has made you stronger for the steep climb ahead! 🙂

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  4. Incredible post, Miriam. So heartfelt. And those beautiful photos marry so well with the turmoil you describe (it also looks like a stunning yet difficult walk … Much like life sometimes). I’m so pleased that you’ve found some light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully you’re heading into calmer waters for some much deserved peace and tranquility. xx

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  5. I don’t know enough about your Mum and what happened in your life to make any meaningful comment, Miriam, but this is a very beautiful post, and I’m glad you’re coming to terms with demons. 🙂

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  7. Wow. I can really relate. I adore how you have journeyed through and found your peace. It’s a very inspiring post. I’m not quite there yet. I hope I can reach the point you are very soon.

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  8. It’s like climbing a rock face beside a lake. Your climbing until your arms ache so bad you think your going to fail. You look down and wonder how deep the water is. You realize you have to let go and take your chances with the unknown.

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  9. Miriam, this post was so insightful. I spent so much time worrying about the future that I was not living in the present. I realized that life was rushing by and I was just an observer. After much soul searching, I started this year with the goal of living deliberately. I’m glad that you’ve found peace with the present 🙂

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  13. I wish I had something profound to say right now. I can’t find the words to describe how this post made me feel. If we were sitting in a room together and you told me all of this I would just get up and hug you. So that’s what I will do here: HUGS.

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  15. I really like the way you intertwined your thoughts with the photos, I think you captured the essence of the theme very nicely. All the best for the future, Miriam, I hope the path smoothes out after the rocky climb.

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  16. I am so happy for you Miriam, it is difficult at times to find our way out, but we can do it, as you say with courage and determination, our focus returns and of we go along the journey of
    life,that as you know we can create for ourselves.
    Take care
    Brooke

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  17. You know most of your posts exude with such inspiring messages and the way you intertwine the photos to the message you convey is just incredible. I am really glad that at the end of all that hard hiking you found peace and whats more you had the big heart to share it with your readers. 🙂

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  21. With your family and friends to support you, I’m sure things will continue to improve. When things are tough, I believe we don’t think at the time about whether we can cope or not. We just do, because others depend on us. It’s only later we look back and wonder how we got through. Best wishes to you Miriam. I hope this year is better for you.

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  22. Hi Miriam thanks for another great post. It is wonderful to see you persevering through the tough times and coming out the other side. I know you are strong enough and capable enough to make it through anything. Have faith. The quote is beautiful and what a wonderful marriage of your words and images. This post is beautiful and something that I needed to hear too, because I’ve been going through a tough year as well. All the best ❤

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    1. Oh Lindsay, I’m sorry to hear you’re going through a tough year as well. Life really does test us, doesn’t it. For me everything just feels so hard and I have to be honest, my days are a struggle. But I’m working hard and trying to stay strong and you’re right, I will get through it. Just as you will too. Thanks for your support my friend. xo

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  23. What a lovely & encouraging post. Thank you for sharing this Miriam. I feel you.. at the sam etime I admire your strength.
    Its a good thing you find refuge in nature, cuz it really never fails to gives us discernment.
    Sending you more positive vibes and happiness.

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  24. I’ ve read somewhere that we should only worry about the 2 steps we are gonna make… and every 2 steps will take us further…. and further and further… very inspiring post you made Miriam… and i love how you ended it strong woman… Much Love to you ❤

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  25. Isn’t it true: life is a long walk on uneven terrain, always. But some years, it feels as though it’s all rocky and uphill, and the peak is in the clouds, so you can’t even tell how much longer it will go on. May you find smoother, easier trails ahead.

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    1. Wise words and so true, for all of us I think. It’s certainly been an uphill trek for me this year which some days feels never ending. Thanks for your kind wishes.

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  26. It is a beautiful post and obviously striking a chord with lots of people. I was going to say I hope each day gets better but I’m putting two and two together a bit and thinking some things will get worse but as you have said it is a part of life. You have support around you and from all the wonderful bloggers too. Take each day as it comes, keep breathing and keep making time for yourself especially the time that you have to concentrate lots, like zhumba when you turn off the problems.

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    1. Thanks Louise, and yes you’re right, deep breathing and switching off during zumba is what will help get me through. Some days I have too much time to think and that’s when it’s worse but as you said, one day at a time. Thanks so much. Hope you’re well.

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  27. What a heartfelt post, Miriam! I’m sorry you’ve had such a tough year, and of course you may have some struggles still ahead of you. But rediscovering who you really are and what you really want is a good thing. Peace to you as you continue your journey, my friend….

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  28. Miriam, I can’t find a contact form so I’m writing this here. I’ve started a new series on Wednesdays where I’m going to share links to posts that I connected with over the week. I wanted to include this post in my first list, but it’s so personal I wanted to ask first. i know you put it on a public blog, but it’s YOUR blog. So, I’m asking if I can share the link in next weeks post? I totally understand if your not comfortable with that. 🙂 If you want to get a feel for what I’m doing the post for this week is up. ❤

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    1. Of course you can Nikki, it’s out there and yes it’s my story but I’m touched that you want to share it. 🙂 If it helps others I’m more than happy. That’s what blogging is all about. Thanks my friend. xo

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  30. I’m so sorry hon – I didn’t realize how deeply you were hurting. *hugs*

    I’m glad you’ve found your peace though, and are back on the track you want to be on. I know about life hurling those tsunamis that sweep us off our feet and leave us breathless and floundering. And once the water starts to recede, the path we were on looks nothing like the path we were on. Regaining your sense of balance and direction about your life and your future is an amazing accomplishment, I’m so happy for you!

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    1. I’m still getting there Vanessa, still struggling a bit and the water’s still receding but I’m definitely on the right track. Thanks so much, your kind words mean a lot.

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  31. Your post reminds me of my past year. It was quite a difficult ride with few things working in my favour. The negativity outweighed any positive thoughts. It took a lot to get back on track. When I did, I turned into a whole new me.
    I really liked the way you compared the toughness of the hike with the difficulties in your life. In times like these, I find it hard to say much. I hope you find the strength to get through these trying times. Take care.

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  32. Such an honest and thoughtful post. Life is full of ups and down. Sorry to hear about your tough year but happy to hear your positive approach now. Your comment .. make peace with the present and the future will take care of itself … is very comforting. Best wishes to you Miriam x

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  35. Mother Nature has her way of helping us learn about life better and give us strength. Everytime you speak of a revelation you relate it experiencing through some interaction with Mother Nature.You live in her lap and she is taking care of you, to help you become strong and live a blissful life! I convey my wishes to you that you overcome all the anxieties and worries – and peace and felicity surround you always!

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  36. Reading this left me feeling raw and vulnerable, too. Your words are soul-piercing. My future at the moment is awash in uncertainty and when I begin to forecast, it appears stormy and troubling. When I feel myself slipping, I try to meditate on the idea that in the present moment, this very second, I am safe, and there is peace in this moment. My past is painful, and it makes trusting hard. Your words are so powerful! I know that they come from a powerful place inside of you. Thank you once more for sharing your courage. I know the journey continues, but every step makes us stronger, and I’m so glad that you’re finding your footing!

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    1. Lulu, I’m sorry if my words left you feeling raw and vulnerable and to hear that your future feels so uncertain. Trust me when I say I know exactly how you feel. It’s hard to stay focused but you’re right to try and anchor yourself in the present, that’s where we’re truly free and safe. Stay firm in your footing Lulu, as you said, every step forward makes us stronger. Peace to you my friend.

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      1. Don’t be sorry, Miriam! A little rawness is a good thing now and then. It leaves fresh ground for growth. I think that I am finding my footing, one toe at a time. Thank you for your positive voice! I hope that you have a wonderful weekend! ❤️

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  37. Beautiful post with gorgeous photos. I am glad that you have found some progress through the pain you have experienced, and I have confidence you come through to other side. Thank you for the follow!

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    1. And thank you too Kris. Nice to have connected. Like I said, I love the content on your blog so look forward to reading more and sharing the journey. Cheers!

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      1. Thank you very much. The A to Z Challenge has been a good opportunity for me to really focus on what my blog is about: seeking happiness. I do throw in some dashes of my misadventures in sports and dating from time to time. And my cats will also appear when they are feeling photogenic.

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  38. Just reading this now Miriam. What a powerful post! Do you know what set things off for you? I had a similar experience after the birth of my first son. I instantly slipped into severe postpartum depression and my life was frightening for three months this until I got over the hormonal imbalance. It was the scariest time of my life but because of it I am so much stronger. Never fear getting some help and guidance! I saw a therapist who helped me softly my feelings and taught me how to deal with anxiety. I am so much better now! I am worried about future menopause but after going through that experience 11 years ago I now have the tools to deal with it. I think everyone goes through very hard times in life. Sometimes we don’t have a reason why and that is ok. Just know you will get through it! 😊

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    1. Thanks Nicole. Yeah I think I do know what set it off. A chain of events that started back then. . Also I think part of the problem is the stage of life that I’m at, drifting and feeling a sense of loss of direction. It’s all combined and left me feeling particularly vulnerable and low. But I’ve been doing lots of soul searching and things are changing, I can feel it. Shifting my focus, well trying hard to anyway. Thanks again Nicole, I appreciate you being there. xox

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  39. What an amazing article! I can relate, and it reminds me of some verse in the Bible not to worry about tomorrow for today have enough trouble of its own. For me, my faith in God is my assurance that no matter what happened in my life, as long as we trust His words, obey His commandments, and be grateful to Him for everything, we can find peace of mind, joy and happiness amidst this cruel world. Cheers!

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